día tres

I am thankful the Savior has not left us on this earth without a latter-day Moses, Abraham, Noah. I cling to the Savior’s invitations and promises that come through His mouthpiece on earth, President Nelson, “Sisters, let us not just endure this current season. Let us embrace the future with faith! Turbulent times are opportunities for us to thrive spiritually. I promise that as we create places of security, prepare our minds to be faithful to God, and never stop preparing, God will bless us. He will ‘deliver us; yea, insomuch that he [will] speak peace to our souls, and [will] grant unto us great faith, and … cause us that we [can] hope for our deliverance in him.’”

“As you study your scriptures during the next six months, I encourage you to make a list of all that the Lord has promised He will do for covenant Israel. I think you will be astounded! Ponder these promises. Talk about them with your family and friends. Then live and watch for these promises to be fulfilled in your own life. …as you choose to let God prevail in your lives, you will experience for yourselves that our God is ‘a God of miracles.’”

“I bless you to be filled with the peace of the Lord Jesus Christ. His peace is beyond all mortal understanding. I bless you with an increased desire and ability to obey the laws of God. I promise that as you do, you will be showered with blessings, including greater courage, increased personal revelation, sweeter harmony in your homes, and joy even amid uncertainty.”

“What will happen as you more intentionally hear, hearken, and heed what the Savior has said and what He is saying now through His prophets? I promise that you will be blessed with additional power to deal with temptation, struggles, and weakness. I promise miracles in your marriage, family relationships, and daily work. And I promise that your capacity to feel joy will increase even if turbulence increases in your life.”

Estoy agradecido de que el Salvador no nos haya dejado en esta tierra sin un Moisés, Abraham y Noé de los últimos días. Me aferro a las invitaciones y promesas del Salvador que llegan a través de Su portavoz en la tierra, el presidente Nelson: “Hermanas, no solo aguantemos esta temporada. ¡Abracemos el futuro con fe! Los tiempos turbulentos son oportunidades para que prosperemos espiritualmente. Prometo que mientras creamos lugares de seguridad, preparamos nuestras mentes para ser fieles a Dios y nunca dejamos de prepararnos, Dios nos bendecirá. Él 'nos librará; sí, de tal manera que [hablará] paz a nuestras almas, y [nos] otorgará una gran fe, y ... nos hará que [podamos] esperar nuestra liberación en él ".

“Al estudiar las Escrituras durante los próximos seis meses, le animo a hacer una lista de todo lo que el Señor ha prometido que hará por el pacto de Israel. ¡Creo que te quedarás asombrado! Reflexione sobre estas promesas. Habla de ellos con tu familia y amigos. Luego viva y esté atento a que estas promesas se cumplan en su propia vida. ... cuando elijan dejar que Dios prevalezca en sus vidas, experimentarán por ustedes mismos que nuestro Dios es 'un Dios de milagros' ".

“Te bendigo para que seas lleno de la paz del Señor Jesucristo. Su paz está más allá de todo entendimiento mortal. Te bendigo con un mayor deseo y capacidad de obedecer las leyes de Dios. Les prometo que mientras lo hacen, recibirán una lluvia de bendiciones, que incluyen mayor valor, mayor revelación personal, armonía más dulce en sus hogares y gozo incluso en medio de la incertidumbre ”.

“¿Qué sucederá a medida que escuchen, escuchen y presten más atención a lo que el Salvador ha dicho y lo que Él está diciendo ahora a través de Sus profetas? Prometo que será bendecido con poder adicional para lidiar con la tentación, las luchas y la debilidad. Prometo milagros en su matrimonio, relaciones familiares y trabajo diario. Y te prometo que tu capacidad para sentir alegría aumentará incluso si las turbulencias aumentan en tu vida ".

true doctrine understood, in all its 5 year old glory

Girls, tonight was too much. You were a bunch of kook-a-laccas, both on cloud 9, giggling like my regular gaggle of girls — plenty of Princess Elena and pork-and-chive dumplings does tend to bring out your best...

Late at night, when daddy is at school, I have to decide if we will read our scriptures together. I usually opt for a prayer instead (if I’m lucky) but tonight I mustered some strength to read. Plus earlier today I talked with multiple friends about similar scriptures and was hopeful about sharing my favorite truths found in a favorite chapter. 

In 2 Nephi 2 Lehi preaches faith and repentance and eternal life loud and clear: you are imperfect so the law condemns you. You cannot save yourself by what you do because it is not perfect. Because of that you can only be saved by the merits and mercy and grace of the holy messiah; you are redeemed because of Jesus’ righteousness and perfection. 

I asked you, who can go to heaven?

You said, we can. 

I said, no, we can’t. The only people who can live with God again are people who never sin. 

Annie, you asked, What is sin?

I said, fighting with Kate. Arguing. Screaming at mommy...

Then I asked, did Jesus sin? No. He was the only one who lived perfectly, so he is the only one who can go back to live with God in heaven — but because He was perfect and paid for our sins, he can take us in!

I said, he can take us back to heaven if, every time we sin, we say, “I’m sorry I was fighting with Kate. Will you please forgive me?”

So we practiced saying sorry, you two laughing your heads off and rolling on the floor. And then, Goosie, after a whopping 92 seconds, you were ready to be done, so you ever so kindly offered to pray. 

In all seriousness you said, “Heavenly Father, I forgive you for your sins. Thank you for the great day we had. Thank you for the good day we had. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen” 

I just don’t think the lesson could have gone any better than that. Though it does seem a vast improvement from your former prayers, “Thank you for our sins...”

There is no shortage of character in this world with you around. 

Seems my kickoff to teaching true doctrine without trace of culture or tradition is starting strong!

And I just cannot wait to see where it leads us...

Chicalindas, esta noche fue mucho, lo tuve que anotar. Eran un montón de kook-a-laccas, riendose y burlandose. La princesa Elena y albóndigas tienden a sacar lo mejor de ti ...

En la noche, cuando daddy está en la escuela, tengo que decidir si leeremos las Escrituras o no. Por lo general, opto por una oración (si tengo suerte) pero esta noche reuní algo de fuerza para leer. Además, hoy hablaba con varias amigas sobre escrituras similares y tenía la esperanza de compartir mis verdades favoritas que se encuentran en un capítulo favorito.

En 2 Nefi 2 Lehi predica la fe y el arrepentimiento y la vida eterna en voz alta y clara: eres imperfecto, por lo que la ley te condena. No puedes salvarte por lo que haces porque no es perfecto. Por eso solo eres salvo por los méritos, misericordia y gracia del santo mesías; eres redimido por la justicia y perfección de Jesús.

Las pregunté, ¿quién puede ir al cielo?

Annie, dijiste que nosotros podemos.

Dije que no, !que nosotros no podemos! Las únicas personas que pueden regresar a Dios nuevamente son las personas que nunca pecaban.

Annie, preguntaste: ¿Qué es el pecado?

Dije, peleando con Kate. Discutiendo. Gritando a mami ...

Entonces las pregunté, ¿pecó Jesús? No. Él fue el único que vivió a la perfección, por lo que es el único que puede volver a vivir con Dios en el cielo, pero debido a que pagó por nuestros pecados, ¡puede llevarnos a nosotros!

Dije que El puede llevarnos de regreso al cielo si, cada vez que pecamos, decimos: "Lamento haber estado peleando con Kate. ¿Me perdonas, por favor?

Así que practicamos, ustedes dos riéndose y rodando por el suelo. Y luego, Goosie, después de la friolera de 92 segundos, estabas listo para terminar, así que tan amablemente ofreciste orar.

Con toda seriedad dijiste: “Padre celestial, te perdono por tus pecados. Gracias por el gran día que tuvimos. Gracias por el buen día que tuvimos. En el nombre de Jesucristo, amén ”

Simplemente no creo que la lección podria pasdo mejor que eso. Aunque parece una gran mejora de tus oraciones anteriores, "Gracias por nuestros pecados ..."

No hay escasez de carácter en este mundo contigo.

¡Parece que mi comienzo para enseñar doctrina verdadera sin dejar rastro de cultura o tradición está comenzando fuerte!

Y no puedo esperar para ver a dónde nos lleva ...

none of us are lost

Seattle, I am coming in the Summer! Likely end of July. Palo Alto, I’ll be there in the spring and in August. Go here to find details and book your sunset soiree! Or sunrise…or any time ;)

1 Nephi chapters 11-15

My Growing Girls,

I love the scriptures and feeling the Holy Ghost teach me! My greatest hope for you is to learn to hear his whisper over every other sound, and then to believe Him, to keep believing Him until you see Christ’s promises to you fulfilled in your life. 

Simply put, repentance means learning to do things His way (5). Here is what I learned this week about repentance, or as Eve calls it, “the joy of our redemption (1).”

Nephi and Daniel had similar visions — they both saw the destruction of their people. I wondered, “How could you go on diligently teaching about Jesus if you saw so much rejection in the end?!” Then the Holy Ghost taught me, “Exactly! This is what the Angel is showing Nephi in these chapters!” 

Jesus Christ came so “none of [us] are lost (2).” 

We might wander, but we can always come home, whenever we want! That is precisely why we teach this gospel — so faith and repentance become automatic to us. These first two principles of the gospel are critical to teach and understand. Like Nephi, we “preach nothing save it were repentance and faith on the Lord, who had redeemed his people (3)” so no matter where our people wander, they know exactly how to come home. 

“And at that day shall the remnant of our seed know that they are...the covenant people...then shall they know and come to the knowledge of their forefathers, and also to the knowledge of the gospel of their Redeemer...they shall come to the knowledge of their Redeemer and the very points of his doctrine, that they may know how to come unto him and be saved. 15. And then at that day will they not rejoice...Yea, will they not come unto the true fold of God? 16. ...Yea, they shall be remembered again...grafted in, being a natural branch of the olive tree…(4).)

It does not matter where we have been; all of us can receive all the blessings. How will He give them to us? By our Faith in Him and Repentance (turning!). And will He welcome us, even run to meet us, every time?! 

Yes, every single time.

He loves you. I love you, Mama

1. Moses 5:11

2. John 17

3. Mosiah 18:20, D&C 6:9, and many more...

4. 1 Nephi 15:13-16

5. D&C 123:17, Exodus 14:13, Isa 30:15-18

Chicalindas!

Me encantan las escrituras y escuchar al Espíritu Santo enseñarme. Mi mayor esperanza para ustedes es que aprendan a escuchar Sus susurros sobre cualquier otro sonido, y creerle! Seguir creyéndole hasta que vean las promesas de Cristo cumplidas en sus vidas.

El arrepentimiento es solo aprender a hacer las cosas como Cristo nos invita: D&C 123:17, Éxodo 14:13, Isaías 30:15-18. Esto es lo que aprendí esta semana sobre el arrepentimiento, o como Eva lo dice, "el gozo de nuestra redención (Moisés 5:11)."

Nefi y Daniel tuvieron visiones similares: ambos vieron la destrucción de su pueblo. Me preguntaba: "¿Cómo podrías seguir diligentemente enseñando acerca de Jesús si al final viste tanto rechazo?". Pero el Espíritu Santo me enseñó: "¡Exactamente! ¡Esto es lo que el Ángel le enseñó a Nefi en estos capítulos!

Jesucristo vino así que "ninguno de [nosotros] está perdido (Juan 17)".

Podemos deambular, ¡pero siempre podemos volver a casa, al convenio, cuando queramos! Esa es precisamente la razón por la que enseñamos este evangelio hermoso, que sepamos de la fe y el arrepentimiento. Estos primeros principios del evangelio son críticos para enseñar y comprender. Al igual que Nefi, "no predicamos nada más que arrepentimiento y fe en el Señor, que había redimido a su pueblo (Mosíah 18:20, D&C 6: 9, y muchos más ...)", así que no importa dónde estemos, sabemos exactamente cómo llegar a casa, a las promesas de Cristo, a sus convenios, que estemos listos para hacerlo.

"Y en ese día el remanente de nuestra simiente sabrá que ellos son ... el pueblo del convenio ... entonces ellos sabrán y llegarán al conocimiento de sus antepasados, y también al conocimiento del evangelio de su Redentor ... . llegarán al conocimiento de su Redentor y a los puntos de su doctrina, para que sepan cómo llegar a él y ser salvos. Y entonces en ese día no se regocijarán ... Sí, ¿no vendrán al verdadero redil de Dios? 16. ... Sí, serán recordados de nuevo ... injertados, siendo una rama natural del olivo ... "

No importa dónde hayamos estado; Todos podemos recibir todas las bendiciones. ¿Cómo nos los dará? Por nuestra fe en él y arrepentimiento (¡girando al corazón!). ¿Y nos dará la bienvenida, correrá hacia nosotros, cada vez?

Sí, cada vez!

to save the world

My shining golden girls,

One recent Sunday I fasted for courage. I don’t want to be scared anymore, of anything! Long car rides, dropping you off at school, protecting you from things that hurt, the worries of keeping you too close or pushing you away. Did you eat enough vegetables today?

And thankfully I feel power helping me choose courage. When I have a choice to make, when feelings begin to overwhelm me I think, “Where is my courage?”

Now, there is a direct correlation between my courage and attitude towards religion and church.

The more I study my scriptures and hear the Holy Ghost, the less I accept general thoughts and opinions; knowledge has felt so clear, so simple. I am practicing taking responsibility for finding answers to my questions and I feel worlds of clarity open my mind and heart.

My faith is firm in Jesus Christ, his mercy and grace, and His love for all of His children. From this foundation comes every thing I will ever invite you to learn as long as I am living.

One warm afternoon on a sidewalk, crouched beside the car, you and I spoke of families. Annie, you casually responded to me, “‘Cause families can look however they wanna look.’” To which I said, “Exactly. And who does Jesus love?” It is a question you both know well, and you shouted simultaneously, “Eddabuddy!!!” (your version of everybody.)

You know God is love.

Christ spent His entire life with people who culture and tradition deemed different, ill, lowly, of less worth or contagious.

And He repeatedly asserted,

“ye judge after the flesh. I judge no man”

“neither do I condemn thee”

“I came not to judge the world but to save the world”

over and over again.

His spent every day trying to help everyone, but especially His followers, understand that we are all the same we just hurt differently, and that He is our Savior, prince of peace, master healer and perfect love.

If he does not judge or condemn, neither do I.

I learn from Him who to love, and how to love.

I trust Him. I love Him. But mostly I am trying to love like Him.

Baby girls, when you have questions, if you go to the source of all wisdom and understanding you will find answers that will fill and soothe your soul. Then, take courage and start with the smallest possible steps to do what you feel! It will pay off in powerful feelings of wellness and self confidence. Power was given to you before you were born to take courage, so step into your skin - as uncomfortable as sometimes skin feels - and take up all of the space you want in the world regardless of culture, tradition, and popular (or unpopular) opinion; you are so needed.

I love you. He loves you always.

Your mama

P.S. All apologies to my readers for any typos! I edit my posts about 49 times after I publish them. If you receive these via email you read version one. If you would like to read the must up-to-date, click the title of the post and you will be taken directly to my actual, and most cleaned-up, post.

P.P.S Bay area I will be there this weekend and can squeeze in one more shoot! Click here to book!

Photos Processed and Scanned by Richard Photo Lab.

Mixtures of Portra 800, Portra 400, Fuji 400h (to finish up the last roll), and Ilford 3200.

Pentax 645nii and Canon 1V

My front yard and the reservoir by the house.

And the goslings and their parents who showed up for the shoot.

Walnut Street

(This was written last week two days before our leaving the most beautiful 7 months of our lives.)

I drove past Walnut Street today, downtown Huntington Beach. Memories, deep feelings, and inspiration washed over me.

7 months ago when Tyler and I were moving to Huntington Beach, finding an apartment was especially difficult. No one wanted to rent to someone they hadn’t met in person, no matter the amount of money one is willing to send ;) Managers kept telling me, “It just hasn’t been done before…”

We specifically wanted this cute apartment on Walnut street, directly one block off the beach!

We pulled out every sales pitch to no avail. That manager, and every manager, said “no.” It became the pattern of our hunt for a new home.

With only a few days left before driving away from Seattle, one manager took a chance on us. He let us FaceTime him, and my soon-to-be good friend even hauled her kids to the bank to get him a check that day!

Finally, a “Yes!”

This apartment in this area has been a miracle. An actual miracle. And today driving past Walnut Street the Holy Ghost taught me:

Had we moved into any other apartment, we would have attended a different ward (church). We would not have met distinct people we feel strongly we moved here to meet! These individuals caused us to ask questions that propelled us onto a new path, and in a new direction. We would not have been on a SIX MONTH lease that now allows us to move out and pursue big dreams!

Every “no” we received was crucial to the single “yes” we needed that was going to lead us to a new path - the most light-filled path, our direct course.  

When I let the days unfold His way, in His time, I give Him space to give the best gifts. And looking back I see each tender mercy that has led us to where we are now.

I am thankful for these moments, for the accompanying peace and surmounting joy they bring. My faith is strengthened in the seemingly small things. When my faith is strong I feel filled with power, with light. I am able to move slowly - to breathe slower, deeper, and trust more.

When I drove Annie to her last day of school in Huntington, I asked who she wanted to say the prayer; she wanted me to say it. I asked her if there was something special she wanted help with that day. She replied, “With my ahhwwtt" (art).” I began the prayer talking about how thankful I am for Annie - her light, her happiness, her talent of always taking care of people and helping. Then I prayed for her and her art that day: that she would produce art that reflected all of her happiness, her gifts, her dreams.

After that prayer my thoughts turned to the verse in Alma, “but behold I say unto you, that by small and simple things are great things brought to pass;” I knew it was true - big miracles (like perfect apartments) come from small things (like simple prayers while driving to school).

These photos were taken on 35mm film (of my precious friend, Liz. If you want a beach shoot, or delicious in-home shoot, OR BOTH, in So Cal, with all of your lovers, GO FIND HER!)

I shot the roll (with multiple double exposures), then rewound it and weeks later shot it again. They were taken on Ektar 100 and pushed one stop. Processed and scanned by Goodman Film Lab.

SALT LAKE CITY, NYC, SEATTLE, BAY AREA, NOR CAL, SO CAL, BARCELONA, O’AHU!!!!! I’M COMING FOR YOU!!! If you want the most freeing photoshoot you have ever experienced book your newborn, elopement, birth, or whatever other session you want here! Even your husband will say, “That was fun!” I promise, it’s a good time!

xo, Christina

Also, call, text, email me with whatever questions you have! I am an open book (bless my husband for rolling in the “no privacy” kinda life. HA!

Whom Seekest Thou?

Jesus Christ invites everyone, “Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Matt 11:28-29

I have been wondering about certain doctrine, specifically relating to the doctrine of our Heavenly Mother. As I have pondered over these topics I felt enlightening moments. 

We know much about Jesus Christ because prophets have been teaching and writing about him for centuries. Multiple people throughout history have seen the Father and the Son, but we know little of our Heavenly Mother.

This is what I have felt as I have studied, and pondered:

While our Heavenly Mother (and Father) have endured an earthly experience, she has not endured our individual earthly experience. She has not felt all of my pain; she has not experienced all of my sorrow.

As much as I want to, I cannot completely understand all of my own children's pain or sorrow. As attentive as I try to be, I can never completely know what they are thinking, or how they are feeling, and why.

There is only one who knows the deepest depths of my heart: He who went to the garden three times in prayer “suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind;…[taking] upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people.”

Alma 7 is one of my favorite chapters, “…there is one thing that is of more importance than they all…”

Has he experienced heartburn and morning sickness and pregnancy pains for 9-10 months? Yes.

“And he will take upon him death,”

Has he experienced the suffocating grief a mother must feel upon losing a child? Yes.

“he will take upon Him [Christina’s] infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor [Christina] according to [her] infirmities.” (Insert your name there!)

Has He physically and emotionally felt everything I, and every woman, could ever possibly suffer and be asked to endure? Yes. 

Why did He go willingly for me? Why did He choose to feel weight so crushing He bled from every pore? 

So that he could “succor” me in my infirmity! So He would know what it physically feels like. So that He could exactly attend to, minister to, care for, bring relief to, comfort, strengthen, and support, me in my needs.

Has he felt loneliness, abuse, addiction, sickness and every other heartbreak that any parent, child, friend, or human would ever experience? Yes.

His atonement is infinite: limitless, endless. By a miracle, and to wholly and completely understand our exact circumstance - to understand you and to understand me - his spirit and His physical body felt all of it.

And He did it out of perfect love for every single human ever born.

He is a gift - our perfect healer, perfect counselor, perfect comforter, perfect consoler, perfect friend. He is the only one who has walked our exact steps, felt our exact feelings - the only one who can take our loneliness, pain, sorrow, and despair and reverse it.

And he earned that right in the garden and on the cross.

So I ask myself: Is there something about His sacrifice that is lacking, that causes me to look elsewhere for comfort, guidance, connection?

What would be my response if He asked me, as He asked Mary Magdelene at His empty tomb, “Woman, why weepest thou? whom seekest thou?”

I believe both Heavenly Mother and Father want us to seek the prince of peace. They point us to the master healer, He who pours out mercy and grace and perfect love. Is that why every time the Father speaks he directs us to His Son, “This is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased. Hear ye Him”?

Everything typifies of and points to Him who pleads with me,

“Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Matt 11:28-29

”We talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ…” 2 Nephi 25:26

I know He heals every ailment as we increase our faith in Him, turn our hearts to Him, and try to be like Him.

He is everything.

“O come, let us adore Him” this Christmas season and always. Always. Always.

Thank you for being here.

xoxo,

Christina

P.S. I hope my blog posts invite introspection, study, pondering, and prayer. I hope they lead you, and me, to brighter light - to the brightest Light.

Speaking of lights………can anyone shine brighter than these? They are everyone’s favorites.